Christmas Nursing Songs

20 A couple of us felt the need to change the lyrics to some Christmas Song Favorites---hope you enjoy!

(To the tune of Oh Christmas Tree)

Oh CBI, Oh CBI, how rapidly you're running!
Oh CBI, Oh CBI, how rapidly you're running!
The foley still is cherry red...
The patient thinks he's nearly dead...
Oh CBI, Oh CBI, When will you stop your clotting!

(To the Tune of Deck the Halls)

Wreck the halls with urine & stool!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Clean the patient like a fool
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Get the rectal tubes a-flowing...
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Seems like everybody's going!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!

(To the tune of Winter Wonderland)

Call light ring
No one's listening
Someone screams
"Stop his *******!"
It's normal at night
To cry out "All RIGHT!"
Working in a midnight wonderland.

Patients Yell
Gimme Pain Meds
What's that smell?
It's the same bed!
You're running the halls
Cuz everyone calls
Working in midnight wonderland.

In the middle there will be a Code Blue
Then we found out that he's a DNR
We'll have fun explaining all of this to
The Person who's in charge of all of us!

Later on, he'll expire
Then we'll call the house doctor
Who sleeps in his room
Don't call him TOO soon!
Working in a midnight wonderland!!

(To the tune of I'll Be Home for Christmas)

I'll be home on Christmas
Don't you dare call me!
I don't care
If no one's there
It's my day to be free

Christmas Eve I'm working
'Til the sun comes up!
And I'll be home on Christmas
So sooorrry---touch luck!!!!

And finally...
(To the tune of Silver Bells)

Poopy Bedpans
Smelly Trash Cans
Dressed in bright yellow gowns
In the air it's a feeling of C-diff....

Patients crapping
Nurses Laughing
Clean up bile after bile
And in all nurses' stations you'll hear.....

Saggy B*alls
Saggy B*alls

It's time for scrotal support!!

Ringaling
Hold up that thing
Soon they will be on the floor!!!!


(To the tune of The Dreidel Song)

We have a vial of Haldol
We use it every day
And if our patients go crazy
You'll surely hear us say

OHHHH Haldol Haldol Haldol
We give to you for sleep!

Haldol Haldol Haldol
You will not make a peep!!

Hope you got a kick outta this....we had so much fun writing these!!!

Merry Christmas Everybody!!! Last edit by ECCRN1996 on Dec 18, '10 : Reason: forgot 1 song
The Haldol Song and Winter Wonderland I'll definitely be singing lol

I wish I was that creative! The verses are soooo true that's what makes them so funny! Thanks for a real day brightener!

That's awesome! Thanks for sharing!

OMG!! That was so clever!!!

Soo funny...thanks for the laugh!

Love it! Still laughing my butt off!

On the first day of Christmas, my torn glove gave to me a blood test in the ED.On the second day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me two heart attacks and a blood test in the ED.On the third day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me three missed days, two heart attacks, and a blood test in the ED.On the fourth day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me four calling sups, three missed days, two heart attacks and a blood test in the ED.On the fifth day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me five antivirals! Four calling sups, three missed days, two heart attacks, and a blood test in the ED.On the sixth day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me six weeks of waiting, five antivirals, four calling sups, three missed days, two heart attacks and a blood test in the ED.On the seventh day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me...A LESSON LEARNED! Double glove!Hope you all got a laugh out of this! Came off the top of my head...which isn't screwed on right

Quote from canesdukegirlOn the first day of Christmas, my torn glove gave to me a blood test in the ED.On the second day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me two heart attacks and a blood test in the ED.On the third day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me three missed days, two heart attacks, and a blood test in the ED.On the fourth day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me four calling sups, three missed days, two heart attacks and a blood test in the ED.On the fifth day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me five antivirals! Four calling sups, three missed days, two heart attacks, and a blood test in the ED.On the sixth day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me six weeks of waiting, five antivirals, four calling sups, three missed days, two heart attacks and a blood test in the ED.On the seventh day of Christmas my torn glove gave to me...A LESSON LEARNED! Double glove!Hope you all got a laugh out of this! Came off the top of my head...which isn't screwed on right

LMAO! You girls are so talented. Merry Christmas to all.