tele floor per-diem??

So I am now on my second year on a tele step down unit. After having my second son i went to perdiem status. I work about once a week day shift. I love that i get to stay home with my boys! But the other day i started to question if i was working enough to keep up my skill set? I work on such a stressful fast moving floor. I had had a really ruff day and Felt so behind on patient care and time management. I felt my "flow" was off, maybe time management? But i was asured by a college it was just the group i had. I guess i was just wondering if its possble to keep this up for much longer? AM i losing it? Its just so hard to find a job that i can work so little with out paying anyone for childcare. I often take classes that are offered to us so I can stay on top of things. But I am just not sure anymore? IS it safe to keep working so little? sometimes i feel like a new nurse all over again, questioning every little thing. Even though the time is passing I dont feel llke a senior nurse! Any thoughts or suggestions ?
You have to decide what you want. Trade offs are a part of life.I have been a once a week per diem nurse for the last ten years. I get to stay at home with my boys during the week, be involved with their schools, have plenty of time for myself and still get the satisfaction of nursing, contribute financially to the family etc.The price I pay is that professional growth is slower. If I had worked the past 10 years full time, I would be a master on the novice-to-mastery scale. I rate my skill as somewhere between competent and proficient. Socially, I am on the outer fringes of my unit too.As far as safety, only you can decide about that. Are you making errors that can harm your patients? The transition to per diem is not always easy, I have found that I get the satisfactions of both work and home without paying for childcare. Eventually the kids get older, and I will return to full time work.