My rose colored glasses got knocked off!

I am wondering if I have the wrong job or if this is nursing. I wanted to become a nurse because I love working with people (even difficult ones) and I want to help people. I love my actual job. I love my patients, even the difficult ones. But I am finding myself dreading to go into work. I helped out a nurse that was overwhelmed and a verbal warning for not following up on a pain medication. I have not just nursing notes and shift assessments to do, but I also have three other online "forms" to fill out on patients. One of them is tricky and the program likes to delete your entry. I forgot to check that it didnt delete and was actually there..... and of course it deleted instead of saving. I got written up for not completing the proper paperwork on my patients. I got a verbal warning because I got cold and put a jacket on and it covered my name badge.
I have a horrible night shift. A nurse went home sick, and one had called out leaving us short two nurses. I had three discharges, two admits and five patients that I only had "for a while" during one eight hour shift, I also gave meds to four patients that belonged to two other nurses because everyone was overwhelmed. I could care for the patients, that is not the problem, my problem is that i am now dreading answering questions about why I did or didnt do something on that day (paperwork related of course). I gave insulin that was well over an hour overdue to three patients that werent mine. I just feel a write up coming for late meds.

Is this nursing? Fearing my job over petty issues? Being afraid to help someone out because I could get written up for their lateness? Do I have the wrong job? (this is my first nursing job).
This is not nursing. This just sounds like your facility is pretty petty. If you have your golden year of experience, you should probably move on.

I am still only a student, yet this feels like my last job. A HOT MESS. I don't think it's nursing, I think it's your job. As the PP said.. if you have your golden year of experience- get out of there before it burns you out and sucks you into the black hole of angry nurses.

Quote from mikala3 i helped out a nurse that was overwhelmed and a verbal warning for not following up on a pain medication. i have not just nursing notes and shift assessments to do, but i also have three other online "forms" to fill out on patients. one of them is tricky and the program likes to delete your entry. i forgot to check that it didnt delete and was actually there..... and of course it deleted instead of saving. i got written up for not completing the proper paperwork on my patients. this is a system failure, not a nursing failure. you have enough to do without having to take the time to double check that your documentation was saved. you are spending way too much time and having unnecessary anxiety over something that shouldn't be your problem. you charted, as you should have and the program deleted your entry. that's a lawsuit waiting to happen, and needs to be addressed by your nm immediately. i can't believe that this has been an on-going problem on your unit that hasn't been addressed. if your nm says that it can't seem to fix the problem in a timely manner, then paper charting should be used until the glitch is fixed. this is not your fault. don't own it, but do be proactive in voicing your concerns to your nm about this. you should not have been written up for this, and i am shocked that your nm spent time composing the paperwork to write you up instead of getting on the phone to it to fix the bug. this is a risk management issue. i got a verbal warning because i got cold and put a jacket on and it covered my name badge. seriously? at least you came in to work your shift instead of calling out sick. this seems petty to me. i have a horrible night shift. a nurse went home sick, and one had called out leaving us short two nurses. i had three discharges, two admits and five patients that i only had "for a while" during one eight hour shift, i also gave meds to four patients that belonged to two other nurses because everyone was overwhelmed. i could care for the patients, that is not the problem, my problem is that i am now dreading answering questions about why i did or didnt do something on that day (paperwork related of course). i gave insulin that was well over an hour overdue to three patients that werent mine. i just feel a write up coming for late meds. is this nursing? fearing my job over petty issues? being afraid to help someone out because i could get written up for their lateness? do i have the wrong job? (this is my first nursing job).

Quote from mikala3 I gave insulin that was well over an hour overdue to three patients that werent mine. I just feel a write up coming for late meds.

Not every nursing job is as you described but I honestly have to say that the nursing profession has a long long way to go in learning how to create an enviroment that is not so oppresively punative. It really needs a complete culture overhaul and one in which the nurses and managment quit clubbing each other with unecessary write -ups and incident reports. What they wrote you up for is really quite laughable if it did not have such a devasting effect on your moral and motivation. So think about this.....in being a great team team player and helping other team members catch up and take care of the patients..you learned that their our now negative consequences....iut makes one say..Well just forget it then...I will only take care of my own patients. The very thing you should be praised for..you now have to answer to. I almost can't believe they wrote you up for something that silly...so what about a sweater..are they going to write you up for that...what if your name badge gets turned around as mine often does..what if an elderly patient cannot read the print..see how silly that is to write that up..if it is such a BIG deal whatever happened to just politely telling someone. I would have asked for the HR policy that states you cannot wear a sweater or jacket. Just out of curiosity I would look for it on my own.