Looking for support re: first full code

I need some support, should probably have started my own thread. I had my first full Code last night. Im very upset about it. I had seen my resident within the one hour before this occured and had not seen a change in status for this resident that would have made me call the Doctor let alone send out to Hospital. I was not able to revive nor was the EMS. I dont know what I could have done differently, but the contact is an attorney who is already up in arms and was threatening on the telephone. Anyone been in this situation before?
post moved to own thread.

We can't give legal advice on here per TOS. I would strongly recommend you contact an attorney and/or malpractice/liability insurance to discuss. If all your ducks are in a row, your charting done completely and appropriately, then you have done what you could.As for the code itself...Honey, we can't save em all, and you will need to accept that. I gather from your post that you are in a LTC setting (forgive me if I'm wrong), and so probably have been with this patient for a while. I know it hurts a whole lot more to lose someone you have been caring for for a while. Try to see if there is any kind of debriefing or employee assistance to help you grieve adequately. Try to use this as a learning experience. What actually happened? If patient had MI, what symptoms should have been there? Sometimes patients don't present with the traditional expected symptoms, especially in males vs. females. IE location and description of pain. Sometimes patients have that sense of impending doom before they crash. Did your patient seem particularly anxious the last time you saw them? Of course this is just an example as I don't know what happened, but you hopefully get the point. That instinct and nursing spidey sense is something that will develop in time. Just learn from this, relax, have a glass of wine or something.

You know, sometimes people just die. There will probably be a post done, and that will get everyone to stand down. Call your malpractice carrier and tell them about this. (You DO have malpractice insurance, right?) It is their job to defend you even if all you need is a pointer letter to the other side telling them to back off. The sooner they know about anything at all, the better. As to the threatening angry sounds, if the contact was a relative, anger/shock/denial is a common first response to an unexpected death. Don't talk to anyone but your malpractice folks, certainly don't talk to the angry guy on the phone. Any such calls should be referred to administration without comment of any kind from anyone including the ward clerk and the housekeeping guy.

Contact a person in the same field as you or a cousellor and debrief!! No matter how much death we see as long as we have the ability to talk it through we remain human, if we don't let it affect us we wouldn't be human.

If you can talk about it with peer nurses, it can be really helpful. I have some friends from nursing school and we vent/debrief as needed. While they don't work with me, they can relate to the stress and I know I can trust them. Now is a good time to be gentle with yourself and accept that it will bug you. I think trying to force yourself to feel what you think you should feel is more harmful than just accepting the occasional thought or feeling as it pops up. I have dealt with some pretty intense situations at my hospital and sometimes, I will have a flashback as I enter one of those rooms or a patient says something similar.

Quote from GeneralJinjurIf you can talk about it with peer nurses, it can be really helpful. I have some friends from nursing school and we vent/debrief as needed. While they don't work with me, they can relate to the stress and I know I can trust them. Now is a good time to be gentle with yourself and accept that it will bug you. I think trying to force yourself to feel what you think you should feel is more harmful than just accepting the occasional thought or feeling as it pops up. I have dealt with some pretty intense situations at my hospital and sometimes, I will have a flashback as I enter one of those rooms or a patient says something similar.