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The last thing you want to hear when you get to work

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61 "Thank GOD you are here! This has been the night from the deepest depths of Dante's hell!"

"Oh you got rm 111? He hasn't stopped having diarrhea all night!"

"Can you take report early?"

"Ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring... ring..." (phone or call bell or both at the same time!)

"There is a family member on the phone of the patient that was admitted 15 minutes ago that you are going to have today."

"Sorry but you have two admits coming."

"Sorry for the assignment."

"Don't kill me for the assignment!"

"You don't have a tech/CNA/PCT"

"Can you call the doc on this troponin of 2.37?"

"Your first of four units of blood will be ready in 15 minutes"

"Sorry about the insulin drip"

"We have a lot of precaution patients"

"The floor is so heavy!"

*Utter silence as everyone is too busy to even make eye contact when you walk on the floor*

"Code One/Blue!"

"You have room 112? She's a total PITA"

"We can't get a sitter for your patient"

"Joint Commission is here."
^Love the JCAHO one...How about the last thing you want to hear when you get home from work? "So...how was your day?" Sometimes I just don't want to talk about it

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Quote from Tait"Thank GOD you are here! This has been the night from the deepest depths of Dante's hell!""Oh you got rm 111? He hasn't stopped having diarrhea all night!""Can you take report early?""Ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring... ring..." (phone or call bell or both at the same time!)"There is a family member on the phone of the patient that was admitted 15 minutes ago that you are going to have today.""Sorry but you have two admits coming.""Sorry for the assignment.""Don't kill me for the assignment!""You don't have a tech/CNA/PCT""Can you call the doc on this troponin of 2.37?""Your first of four units of blood will be ready in 15 minutes""Sorry about the insulin drip""We have a lot of precaution patients""The floor is so heavy!"*Utter silence as everyone is too busy to even make eye contact when you walk on the floor*"Code One/Blue!""You have room 112? She's a total PITA""We can't get a sitter for your patient""Joint Commission is here."

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Oh, the NM wants to see you in the office right now. Nurse X will cover for you. Something about your license expiring?The charge nurse called out today. You're it!Since the payroll system went down last night, you won't be getting your paycheck till NEXT week. Unless you go down to the payroll office which is off-campus and fill out a request for a paper check. But you have to do it before lunch. The construction workers damaged the main water line to the hospital, and we have to use sterile water for the next few hours until they can fix it. We only have the 500cc bottles, though. There are no more scrubs in the OR-the linen department didn't stock it last night. Actually, there ARE scrubs, but I think only sizes 3 and 4X. Oh, don't worry about report-you are needed immediately for an emergency ex-lap. The pt should be up in a few...oh wait, there is the pt now going down the hall. GO! You need to scrub this case. Don't forget that the CEO and the VP will be observing your case today. What do you mean you didn't know? I thought I sent you an email. I guess I forgot. Sorry...don't worry, you'll do fine! It's just a Whipple procedure on an 87 year old!

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didn't have time to make coffee

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"Hope you brought your roller skates"

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What are YOU doing here today?

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I work in longterm care (geriatric/psych) so it's a bit different, but so far what I hate to hear when I first walk in (that I've heard at least ten times in my five months at this job so far, as part time night shift nurse - I fill in for the full time nurse; we're the only nurses here at night, and only ever 1 at a time in my 40 bed facility) is: We have a new admit with no psych meds ordered, and he's been off the wall all evening. The doctor's on vacation. Good luck!We have a resident who has been trying to climb out of bed all evening although he/she can't walk AND is on hospice AND the Ativan isn't working AND he/she isn't allowed another one for another four hours, AND he's still a full code for some bizarre reason even though he weighs 90 lbs and CPR would kill him anyway, so good luck!Thank GOD you're here! Tonight was crazy. Oh, by the way, you had a call off, so you only have two aides, but one of them is leaving early because she came in early due to our shift also having a call off. Oh, by the way, resident A is actively dying. Oh, and he's a full code.I really want to know why hospice patients are still full codes sometimes??

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Sorry about the empty beds.

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I think I have heard all of those...the JCAHO was the one that bothered me the LEAST!

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"Two nurses called off tonight, your working short. Oh, and there is an arrest 5 minutes out". "I just gave the pt your taking kayexalate"."The helicopter is grounded and a RN has to go with the pt on this transport".

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"You're being floated to...""That patient rolling by is the new theraputic hypothermia post-code patient you're going to take." (They are 1:1 and are very labor intensive.)"You're the lucky one that got tripled." (Our standard ratio is 2:1)"Sorry, you have CVVH with another patient since we are short staffed." (CVVH should be 1:1)"The intensivist today is Dr. ********." I never knew one person could make my blood boil so quick!On a positive note, I don't hear these very often!!

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I work for a vet so some of mine are going to be alittle bit different."The Smith dog was dead in the cage this morning and Mrs. Smith is on the phone right now"."The doctor is going to be late"."The kennel kid, receptionist, (Insert some other job title here) is sick so you have to do her job and yours too."The big hairy spay just finger painted her kennel (code brown). She will need a bath and brushout before she goes home in your spare time"."The mean black cat in three took her hood off and her catheter out. The doctor wants her to have 300CC of LRS over the course of the day. You'll have to put another catheter in"."There's a rabies suspect dog in the back that no one can touch. You need to care for it since your rabies titer came back good".My response is "I'm going on vacation today. I'm just here to put my pets in to boarding. See Ya"Fuzzy
Author: jone  3-06-2015, 17:53   Views: 593   
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